Last Attempt

I was standing in a luscious forest, trees so tall you couldn’t see their tips. Circled around me seemed to be every one I knew. Everyone I loved. My face began to beam with excitement. I could feel the heat rushing to my cheeks. They were all there to see me, weren’t they? At first it just appeared on their faces; acts of disgust. Confused I turned to my mothers face searching for answers. Something, this was not right. Her mouth was open as if… and that’s when I heard it; heard those awful screams. The screaming became louder and louder. Putting my hands to my ears I touched something wet. My ears were bleeding. I pressed together my lids to steady my trembling body. I couldn’t hear what they were saying. The noise became unbearable, I fell to my knees. I tucked my head into my chest lowering my spin until it rested upon my thighs. That noise, that terrible terrible noise. This noise, intended to kill me. The loudness then turned to dead silence. This silence, more deafening than the shrieks before it. As I opened my eyes, everything was pale and bright. The faces continued to scream but no sound escaped their parted lips. That’s when the real torment crept in. I could hear it now. Everyone’s individual voices coming through as a whisper but unsettlingly clear. I heard them all at once, rushed; never ceasing to end. At first it came in soft, pulsating through my ears to the rhythmic motion of my unsettled heart. It came so fast, how could I even begin to prepare. The whispers, reassured me of all my secrets. All my hidden wounds rising now to the surface. The whispers began to pierce my skin as every insecurity was clarified, unbearably true. Unexplainable bruises began to form on my arms. Lacerations soon taking there place. They were killing me from the inside out. My bones began to rend. The pain, turning the cold air stale on my lips. Then I saw you. You’re eyes your own, so rich and brown; searching. I remembered. You showed me your fear once. I don’t think you meant to but I will never forget. You brought me to your bed and opened a book. Inside were words you did not write. Unsettling images, formed on the pages, written in someone else's hand. How could this be you, this darkness in these words? Your eyes were fixed on mine. Were you looking at me, or who you thought I might see? You’re voice was a steadied whisper. You showed me a page and the story was real but you were wrong. The boy, it’s not you. As I came back to the present your eyes grew dull. Dead, was the feeling once shared between us. I knew then, that whatever drew from those hauntingly beautiful lips, would draw my last breath. It was yours to take. The ground began to give way. As I slipped between the cracks I took one last look, your back was turned on me. That feeling, right then that sheer agony, I never knew the power you held. You were walking away and I then ceased to exist. The blackness absorbed my senses and I was falling. Waiting to hit the ground to end my torment, that wasn’t there intention. I was stuck in this damnation. This was my hell. You had warned me once. You were wrong. As the realization crept in through every crevice of my weakening heart, I awoke. I was standing in a luscious forest, trees so tall you couldn’t see their tips. Circled around me seemed to be every one I knew. Everyone I loved. My face began to beam with excitement. I could feel the heat rushing to my cheeks. They were all there to see me, to see me die for all eternity.