Through Angels Eyes

I was so young and you were so far from right. You wrote stories in my mind that are now faded hauntings. You drew pictures of clowns and hung them up on your drowning walls. Did they really hold his soul? You lied of love for you taught only pain. Moments of kindness now ripped through your teeth. Sown the scars, your art on my skin. Throw me back agains't the wall, it won't make you a man. You need to pull out your Angels Eyes, for you created this beautiful mess. There goes your Daddy's girl.

Brisk

Thin air hits my lungs like the brisk cold shoulder you’ve turned to my heart
I sleep standing, guarded to the next prince who tries to slay my demons
You all believed you were perfect, until it came to that point where forced to choose
My head in my hands and your feet consume my depth
In through my mouth you take what you can until you stand upon my grave
That’s how you got your crown in this fucked up town you call home
A back turned isn’t quite enough, taking till I’m gone

Jumble/Unedited

covered in cloth, layering pale skin
in my night summer sweats
where do I begin

something is always unsaid
within your rich eyes
something unread

you'll never understand until you read it outloud
that's how beauty works
away from the crowd


I am sick of lying
hoping it will inspire my mind of beatiful stories
although i am not full of beautiful stories
this stories will make you sick
of the coward i am
so miserable, go fuck your best
because I am down and out
and now i dream of the rich eyes of a boy
who started this nightmare
played in my heart

Birthday Poem (Love Zachary)

"You brighten my darkest days. You laugh along with out silly ways. You listen to me vent. You might even own a vent? I can no longer rhyme, but that was only a matter of time. You are the best friend anyone could know and I'm happy I've been able to watch you grow into the beautiful girl I've come to love. You rock and I think I lost a glove. This poem sucks. But I hope it made you smile. Happy birthday Jordan Olson-Lyons."

You're just.. (Love Justin)

"You're just.. the way you think and your voice. I loved hearing both. It made me appreciate knowing a girl as amazing as you in my life. And you're funny and adorbale. Things will get better. They have to. This is just a growing pain."

The principle of time and the existence of life are not always kind nor fair but for as long as my forvever is, it is forever for you.

Unfinished

Your lies become truth to me. As you sing from the gallows a song of self righteousness and pride. You see yourself as a superior habitant of this earth.

Second

Time is the perceivable state in which a child stumbles upon when questioning the state of a second and that second is eternal in that moment but non existent from the before and after. No greater is a second then a lost memory but crucial in every possible way. As it defines us until it doesn't.

Peace Was Hung Around Her Neck

The driver looked away for just a second. In an abandoned field, a blurry figure stood alone. The time? He wouldn’t know, nor would he care, for that moment was in it's perfect serenity. His eyes couldn’t be ripped off it. As he approached it, the figure's design came into focus. Then he knew. It was a girl. Age unknown; for her skin seemed to only be an external mask, but he saw her. He saw all of her: her heart, her soul, it was all on display. He was meant to see her. Her eyes were closed as she faced the sun. The sun's rays planted tiny peach coloured kisses along her face. The moments became decades, decades he could never wish to be returned. He was the only car in sight for miles. The abandoned field lay flat. He could drive off the end of the world. At that moment, the descending sun drizzled its last bit of warmth onto everything in sight. He focused on her lips as they began to dance. Was she singing, or speaking to the very depths of humanity? His car was almost at a halt, wishing nothing more than to hear the words uttering out of a mouth like no other. Little did he know he was holding his breath. He took a slight glance away from her lips onto the top of her visible collar bone. There lay a necklace, a necklace of peace. Nothing could be as real as her. He watched her throat move as she swallowed. He knew all of life’s secrets. His own secrets, his sorrow, seemed as though it would never compare to what he felt in that moment, to her. For the first time in five years, he let himself smile. It almost caused him a tinge of pain to do something so unnatural, so forlorn. His cheeks were stretching to new lengths. A blur of red came across and took his breath away. His attention was drawn from the girl with no face. As he watched the car drive away through his rear view mirror, it started to rain. The rain pinned him down, forcing him to see the graying sky where his soul once belonged. He turned his neck around, feeling as though he was betraying himself for ever focusing on anything but her. It was blank where she once stood. Doubt came flooding in. Had he fallen asleep? As his heart rate increased, one could almost see it through his shirt. With each breath, his heart quickened.. then came to a complete halt. She sat beside him, in the passenger seat. Her eyes, filled with a swamp of bluish green. Her smile, small and timid. Her very being couldn’t hold him back now, it was too late. He felt the need to speak. It made him physically sick as his mind raced for the right words to utter. “I remember”, he spoke in a faint whisper. His voice cracked. His heart was like a bomb ricocheting in his ears. The rain stopped.

Only You

Content is in which the essence I write from. When shapes in stones begin to outline your face. I'm alone here or so I thought. The breeze off the oceans tide kisses this freckled face where I use to feel those strong hands. I close my eyes, for touch is a sense made strong by you. Facing the ocean my eyes water from this cold chill but I see a ship on the horizon and there you lie beneath white sails and see my face in these clouds. Love, stronger then this distance and it travels by wind. So when you feel that cool breeze upon your cheek, close your eyes and imagine my hand. For there will be a day when you open them and see these green eyes staring back. Seeing you and loving only you.

Worthy Of Love

Everyone told me monsters don't feel.
But everyday I find myself loving one further.
If anything he is the only one who makes me feel anything at all.
Like I deserve this love too.

Two Months From Home

I grab my pen and paper as I always have and sit to write down these thoughts I don't dare to say aloud. In this hallow, cold room my hands fumble and my thoughts run dry. Your voice comes as a scream to me "You're stronger then this" but you have no idea what strong is. Strong is staying when I know things will get tough and bearing to feel the sarratted edge of loves intentional pain. Being but a mere young girl I was never allowed to say sorry or cry as it was a sign of his weakness. As I get older it is all I seem to accomplish. I know you're growing old of my love, for that I have never felt so low. It hurts me that you think my ignorance was best and now I am lost as what I am. I'd change every line for you but you wont come out and ask me to. It's slow and painful and I take in all that you want. You search this world and convince strangers to love and hold you. Your face and fortune has done you well. I wish I could be that for you but you will never ask me to. When you see me I will pretend as though the sky is blue and there is a tune I sing my songs to. I rip out this page so you wont see this scar on me. The scar of how I feel and how I see. My strength is my own and you have not earned the right to feel its depth. Maybe you never will.

Revised

One hands closed and another ones closing.
Betweem the fingers on a hand perfectly matched to his own.
His eyes are shut, shut from the ones trying to take away his song.
His voice comes rushed as he pleads to her.

But she ran away not knowing of her mistakes.
She had to escape and now I find her coming back to take my fears away.
Jump into these arms.
Don't go this alone.

I Knew When You Called Me Crazy

One hands closed and another ones closing. Around the heart of the forgotten. My eyes are shut, shut from the ones taking my breath away. I'll hold my tongue. You cling to the attention of liars and bandets. I race to show you a love cemented inside my heart. So I go and I know when to lower my arms again. And I race and I race to a place where I melt into this ground. Here I will stay. One hearts closed and another ones opening. To the heart of a new beginning. I sow these ribs. Around my heart strings and shut out from this reality. But I built my foundation with cement and tears. Which is all that is left of this home. So I go and I know when to lower my arms again. And I race and I race to a place where I melt into this ground. Here I will stay. One tear falls and another ones falling. Onto the shoulder of the forgiving. I close these hands tight. Though I hold no key for I threw it away long ago. My fears come to life but I know where I stand. This cement is my home.. watch as I rebuild these walls. So I go and I know when to lower my arms again. And I race and I race to a place where I melt into this ground. Here I will stay.

Rays

We run away from the sun to see how far its rays will reach us. When our legs are worn and our hearts are heavy, only then will we turn back around and feel its warmth.